Please don’t ask why I need this.
It would be great if the food also made me sweat less.
It has to be something I can easily find.
EDITS FOR CLARIFICATION:
-
I am not planning on partaking in any illegal activities.
-
I do not condone the use of illegal substances and am not planning on smuggling anything anywhere.
-
I am not going on a hiking trip or mailing myself anywhere.
-
I will be staying in a tent (not a small one; a huge with with air conditioning and everything). I will be traveling for five days, returning to my current location on day 3 and traveling again on the last two days. I will not poop on the first three days (hopefully).
-
Clean toilets with all the expected facilities will be available to me. I am not going to poop for reasons that I wish to keep to myself.
-
If it gets bad, like really bad, like a-piece-of-poop-is-literally-halfway-out-my-ass bad, I will use the toilets.
Please stop asking because I am not telling anyone the reason.
Okay I’ll give in a tiny bit only because this barely narrows it down: one of them is ridiculously close to what is actually the case. Like, I’m actually doing the thing you mentioned in the point, just your reasoning is wrong.
P.S.: The actual reasoning is borderline impossible for anyone to guess so just stop trying guys.
P.P.S.: I’ve decided that if someone actually manages to guess it, I’m gonna confirm it.
Just for readability, these are the options with reasoning:
He’s probably out on the Hajj, they travel to some of the key points by train. The bathroom facilities are not ideal and that’s why he is asking for ways to trim down his poop times.
But he said that he’d make the whole trip twice and that he’d be able to poop the second time
As part of the hajj, the entire community travels to various points in and around the city. One of the points that’s only for a few days is in Mina, which is basically a tent city outside the official boundaries of the city of Makkah. When they are in the tent (it’s a fancy tent, air conditioned but with zero privacy with 20 other guys), the bathrooms there are communal, which in turn are not the cleanest in the world. Most of them are the eastern squatty potty style. Let’s just say not going there for a poop seems very tempting. The counter to it is, most of the food there is free, and it is really good… So it’s a very delicate balance to say the least.
This is all speculation on my part, given the timing of it. For all we know it could be some weird kinky camping thing the guy is into!
Damn, I thought you were just an Amazon employee.
One of those scenarios + poop shy around S/O, S/O family, or friends is my guess.
Edit: also, cheese, lots of cheese.
Edit2: is this the new “found a safe”?
Why would he not want to say the reason though? If that was the case, the OP could just say he is a shy pooper. Instead we now suspect that this is some kind of orgy with a fetish.
They said that facilities would be everywhere “as normal”.
Also, they said they’d be taking travelling, the same route twice, first time around they can’t poop, second time they can.
You can poop in the shipping container dude, what are the people shoulder to shoulder to you going to do? Leave?
You’re going to a Burning Man-style event and you don’t want to poop on June 25th because it’s Anne Frank’s birthday and in your pursuit to become the true Hide & Seek Champion you think it would be best/hilarious to “Anne Frank” your poop for three days
My guess is that OP is going to be in a circus performance (which explains the large tent with air conditioning). As to the reason they don’t want to poop, it might be because:
Anyway, best of luck to you OP. Hope whatever you’re doing works out and that you stay as safe as you can. Update us when you come back!