My favorite clean joke, what do call a ship on the ocean floor that twitches? A nervous wreck.

" I can’t fire my rifle! My hand is cramped up!"

Exactly! Same thing happened to a girl I used to know. She had two cactuses, put one on a window behind a curtain and forgot about it. The other, in full view, she kills it with her love. She finds the other thriving when she is packing up for a move.

To shreds, you say.

See, what people don’t realize, cactus thrive on neglect.

Right? Throw in a “I have spine, but no arms or legs. Sometimes, I have dog ears.”

But is it as good as Cheddar Goblin™ brand maccaroni?

What about the donkey teeth?

https://youtu.be/3zDHSLDY0Q8?si=M1xO-xHCbKjFText

Like anything, You have to pay extra for that…

Or maybe strapped to a tree in a forest full of hungry horny grizzly bears. Is that better?

Hello, fellow dog percussionists.

You have to pay the troll toll to get into that’s boy’s hole soul.

https://youtu.be/cZiEAdpX3_o?si=BXjKCmQs8gW_iOja

This is one of my favorite stories, second only to the princess and the pee.

I had the same thought when I was watching “Alone”. They pay them about 1000 bucks a week to document themselves struggling to live in the woods. Some of them are pulled out for medical reasons, some quit. But for some, this is probably the only way they can afford a vacation.

Better then crunchy frogs?

“He is a bit grumpy!”

I binge watched Wilfred, and afterward I watched a movie called “Maniac”. If you haven’t seen it, Elijah Wood is murdering young women in a first-person view. It felt like a very dark series finale.

Now we have to find a kid named shinji and tell him to get in the god damn robot.

Didn’t the ending have the text, “What the fuck”?

I kind of like:

Crocodiles?! Do not swim here?