CW:Venting
I feel like I just really need to vent, the past month or so has been hard for me. I have been getting misgendered more and more often, I feel like I went backward, (gained weight maybe) I can hardly look at myselfd a ton of the time I feel so awful. Today was kinda a boiling point, I went somewhere with my dad (who has not had the best track record) he repetitively misgenders me, my son, deadname, and he commented on my weight. I got really mad when he was trying to invite someone to eat with us and said HE HAD TO MISGENDER ME cause if people at work found out they would be mad (this is Arkansas) and I asked him why would he invite someone who he had to misgender me in front of. I have been so stressed ever since I graduated, the job market scares me, landlords in other states scare me, generally just feel awful and feel like I am gonna fall flat on my ass also living in a red state you know your rights are one SCOTUS case from being gone for decades.
god-fucking-dammit I feel you on the being terrified of the various markets(I’m in a more secure position, but still in a very Red state)
I am so sorry you’re having a rough time girl, and stuff is messed up/offspring song) but some (possibly stupidly Hopeful) part of me is hopeful things will get better someday.
I am so proud that you have been able to come out to your parents! That feels miles ahead of me, I’ve only come out to 1 person and part of that is because I don’t really even know where I am as far as gender identity. I feel literally nothing when asking “how do I feel about myself”.
You sound so much more confident than myself!